Insanely Scrumptious (Healthy?!? Easy?!?) Chocolate Pudding

It’s fast (less than 5 minutes start to finish).

It requires no cooking and creates minimal dirty dishes.

It’s so much healthier than the stuff from the store it’s ridiculous.

OK… it’s got honey, which is a form of sugar, but it’s not processed and it’s dessert.  And we all need a little sweetness in our lives, for goodness sake! And the main ingredient is a vegetable! Or is it a fruit?  Either way it’s not poly-sorbate-mono-unsaturated-lord-only-knows-what.  And it’s not high fructose corn syrup, either.

It’s so chocolaty-delicious you will want to stick your face in the bowl and lick it clean.

Yes. It really is that good.

If you are skeptical, here are my food-judging qualifications:  I really love to eat.  I totally acknowledge the value of “real” food (no artificial or refined  ingredients) and I fully believe that organic, local food is best.  That said, I find both Doritos and those little chocolate donnettes in a wax bag from the gas station to be nearly irresistable.

Long story short, I’m making strides toward eating healthier but I am not the standard by which you should model your diet plan.

BUT…

This recipe is a meeting of the worlds.  It is junk food…. made from fresh vegetables (fruits?).  Which makes it not really junk, right?  That has got to be what heaven is like.

The original can be found at Mind, Body, Green.  This is a great site that I’ve only just recently discovered but have thoroughly enjoyed.

I made a few changes, because I’m not a huge fan of maple syrup and I found their version a bit heavy-handed on the cinnamon (though Handsome Hippie Hubby liked it that way).  The recipe says it’s for 3 people.  Make extra.  You’re going to want it!

Let me know how you like it!

CHOCOMOLE

*  1 avocado

* 3 TBSP cocoa powder

* 1/2 tsp vanilla

* 1/4 cup of honey

* 3/4 tsp cinnamon

* 2 TBSP soy or almond milk

Toss it all in a blender or food processor and run it until it’s smooth.

Enjoy it plain or use it as a dip for strawberries or other fresh fruit.

*UPDATE*

The original post called the pudding “vegan.”  It occurred to me, in the middle of the day while I was folding laundry (why do thoughts pop up at such random times?) that, since I used honey instead of maple syrup it wasn’t really vegan any more.  But it’s still yummy! If you’re a purist, stick to the original.  Sorry about that!

Are you, too, seeking to save the earth, promote world peace and raise productive citizens without expending too much effort?

Why not follow LazyHippieMama on WordPress, by email or Facebook to get all the updates.

If we work on our goals together, they may be a little easier to achieve!  

Please Eat More – My Earth Day Post (made from 95% recycled material)

I’m not sure she’s going to be able to finish that piece of watermelon!

On Earth Day we hear a lot about recycling so I decided to recycle this post from last year… with a few updates, to keep things interesting.

When I look at my WordPress stats the one that consistently floors me is the little world map.  My humble little blog has been viewed by people in NINETY FIVE different countries!  That just completely stuns me.  What a world we live in!

Just a generation or two ago, being so effortlessly in communication with, literally, every part of the globe was unheard of!  Every day it is becoming increasingly easy to see how inter-connected the entire planet is.  My grandparents didn’t worry about pollution in China or over population in India or oil spills in Nigeria.  Modern technology has made us more aware that those things do affect us, just as our actions have an effect on everyone else. We cannot pretend to live in an isolated bubble.

That said…

I don’t know if my international readers have noticed this problem; I would love it if  you would take a moment to share. Americans are killing the Earth because we just don’t eat enough!

So today, on Earth Day, I’m asking you to please eat more.

OK. So maybe we Americans, chubby people that we are (as a nation. I know that many of you are perfectly fit and you should hold your healthy heads high!), get plenty to eat.  But we WASTE SO MUCH!!!  Did you know that, in 2004, researchers at the University of Arizona determined that 50% of the “ready to eat” food in the United States is thrown away?  Think about that!  HALF of the food produced in this  nation is thrown in the garbage!

Kinda makes you want to go dumpster diving, eh?  Oh. Right. Yeah. Me either. Gross.

My friend, Paul, will be mentally climbing into his pulpit to preach right now about the injustice of people starving in a nation that THROWS AWAY HALF of its food and he is absolutely positively for-ever-and-sure right to do so!  I am  standing strong with him on this one.

BUT that’s not what I’m getting at today.

Nor am I intending this to be a push for people to eat more “real” food, grow their own and buy local though I am 100% in support of all those things.

Today is Earth Day.  The day we randomly selected to pay respects to that big round ball (oblate spheroid – I’m a nerd. I admit it)  that God gave us dominion over.  And here’s what I’m thinking….

Living in rural Michigan I am surrounded by farms.  It’s easy for me to witness what it takes to make food.  There are trucks that haul seeds to a giant silo.  There are trucks that haul seeds to the farm.  There are tractors to til the earth and plant the seeds and spray pesticides & fertilizer on the plants and harvest the ripe food. There are trucks and trains that haul stuff to factories where it is produced into various pre-made dinners or sauces or juices or whatever or to the market where it needs to be sprayed with water or refrigerated or frozen. Then we buy it and DRIVE it home in our cars and more refrigeration or freezing is required before we cook it and eat it. And that’s not even considering the animals and their water and food and milking machines and fans for summer and heaters for winter…….   you get the idea.

BUT we only eat HALF!!!!  So all that gasoline, the poison sprays going into the ground, the electricity for storage and preparation is FOR NOTHING!  AAAARRRRGGHHHHHH!!!

Have you ever seen your child wasting food that you paid hard-earned money for?  Didn’t it make you crazy?  It drives me up the wall!  It is a serious, MAJOR pet peeve of mine.  But the truth is, I do it too. I buy too much produce and throw it away when it spoils.  I don’t feel like eating the tiny bit of leftover pot roast so I toss it in the trash.

Apparently, as a nation, we are ridiculously, sinfully guilty of this.

So today I’m simply asking you to take care of the Earth by doing what I ask my children to do.  Take all you want. But eat all you take!

And for goodness sake, ENJOY IT!

Chubby Hippie Baby (AKA: Captain Spaghetti Beard) is the poster child for enjoying your food. He eats with GREAT enthusiasm.

Lazy Hippie Mama’s Guide To Tipping

I originally posted this on July 9, 2012.  This week, Handsome Hippie Hubby tells me the world needs a reminder, so I’m doing my share.  Hopefully this will be helpful to those who wonder about how much to leave and those who wonder why people aren’t leaving enough.  Happy eating!

This post isn’t especially hippie-ish.  I was talking with the Handsome Hippie Husband this morning on the subject of tipping and he said, “you should blog about this.”  So I am. Because I am empress of this particular web page and I can. (Heeheehee.  I have been wanting to declare myself empress of something for a VERY long time!)

We, here at the Hippie Household, pay our bills (theoretically speaking) with money made from tips.  HHH is a server in a fancy-pants restaurant. It’s the kind of place where it’s not only possible but probable that a couple will run up a $100-200 bill for dinner and drinks.  It is a place that prides itself on providing extraordinary food and service.  They hired him because he is the rare server who actually cares that his guests have a great experience, he’s not in it just for the tip.  It’s a true joy to him when someone leaves smiling from ear to ear.  That said, true joy doesn’t pay the rent, and it’s incredibly discouraging to do everything humanly possible to create a wonderful experience for someone and then have them stiff you.

He expects to average 20% of his sales in tips every evening, as do his co-workers.  10% is an insult.

Does that seem extravagant to you?

Consider this:  servers in Michigan earn an average hourly pay of $2-3.   That’s right, at the end of a 40 hour work week their paycheck is about $80, or just enough to pay the taxes on their hourly wage + tips.  Yes, contrary to popular opinion, tips must be declared to the IRS and servers are frequently audited.  The state (as does every state that I know of, except California) expects servers to make the majority of their pay in tips so they do not fall under the minimum wage rule.

If you’ve never worked in a restaurant you may not understand that certain things are not under your server’s control in any way shape or form and should never effect how much you leave in a tip.  In a lot of restaurants (including the one where HHH works) the server is not allowed to ever say, “I’m sorry that xyz happened, but it’s really all the kitchen’s (bartender, busser, etc) fault.”

To make it a little easier for you to keep straight what is or is not your server’s responsibility, here is a helpful list of reasons why NOT to stiff your server.

*  Your food is over/under cooked, too hot, too cold, badly seasoned, etc. This is the kitchen’s mistake.

*  Your alcoholic drink or “mocktail”  takes forever or isn’t made correctly. This is the bartender’s mistake.

*  The restaurant is too hot, too cold, too crowded, too noisy, too bright, too dark, etc. This may be up to the host(ess), or manager to fix.

*  You are mad at your date. That is his/her fault.

*  The menu isn’t to your liking.  Go somewhere else.

* Your food is taking forever. This is usually due to any number of problems in the kitchen.

*  You don’t get seated as quickly as you like.  Go somewhere else.

*  You had a bad day.  Order an extra drink, or a high-carb appetizer, right off the bat to fix this problem.

*  The silverware/glassware is spotty.  The busser usually sets the table.

*  The host(ess), busser, or other restaurant staff are unpleasant.  Speak with a manager about the person’s inappropriate actions.

*  Your server looks like the ex that treated you like dog poo on the bottom of his/her shoe.  Refer to “bad day” advice, or ask to be seated in a different section.

*  The food is more expensive than you expected.  Do your research.  The tip should be considered part of the bill.  If you can’t afford to tip, you can’t afford to eat.

*  You are cheap.  Uhm… well… maybe you should just eat at home.

Keep in mind that every other employee of a restaurant collects their pay whether you leave happy or not.  If you are upset because of something an hourly employee did, speak to the manager.  Leaving a crappy tip doesn’t hurt anyone but the server, who was probably just as frustrated as you by the slow kitchen, shoddy busser, etc.  If you have a bad experience because of something an hourly employee did and your server was trying hard to appease you, perhaps you should consider asking the manager for a discount on your bill because of the trouble and then leaving some of that extra cash for the waiter.  After all, he (or she) was not only being your servant, but kissing your rump to make up for the jerk who wasn’t doing their job.

By all means, keep in mind the old adage that TIPS are “To Insure Proper Service.”  If you get very poor service the tip should be adjusted accordingly.  Unless your server spit in your food and purposely threw your drink in your lap you should never shaft them entirely.  Even if they’re not good at their job they are putting in an effort to SERVE YOU, and they’re (for all practical purposes) not being paid by their employer to do that.

Good reasons to dock a servers tip.

* Your server was texting, flirting, gossiping, smoking, etc. instead of filling your empty drink as you nearly perished from the first bite of your five-alarm burger.

*  Your server was rude, vulgar, or disrespectful in any way.

*  Your server failed to take care of multiple things you asked for (ketchup, cream, a clean spoon, a to-go box, etc).

*  Your server is the ex who treated you like dog poo on the bottom of his/her shoe.

Other random tidbits:

*  If you are paying with a gift card or coupon, your server is still doing as much work as if you were paying in cash and should be tipped on the full amount of the bill – not the discounted total.

*  If you order a lot of “fussy things” – milkshakes, half-caff coffee, hot tea with lemon on the side, deserts that require assembly or special presentation, etc – please give your server a few extra moments to accommodate your special request.

*  If something is not right, your server can do nothing to fix it if you don’t communicate with them.  Perhaps it is, indeed, the servers fault.  But we all make mistakes and deserve the chance to correct them to the best of our ability.

So, there you have it.  This Hippie’s guide to being nice to my husband…. uhm… I mean… your server.  Now kick the new week off right.  Go to your favorite restaurant, order the best thing on the menu, savor every single bite of it, and tip your server well.

Reading Labels and Eating Giant Snickers Bars

Yahoo! posted an interesting article today about some of the most common food additives that we goofy Americans tend to consume on a daily basis without a thought.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:  You need to learn what’s in your food!

This isn’t like learning calculus or the history of French poetry ( I TOLD those teachers I was never going to use it!).  This knowledge is actually useful and important!

Unless you build roller coasters or launch rockets for a living, you don’t need to know this!
(Image from oaklandcc.edu)

If you feel like it is too much to go 100% “real” food (like me… the very idea totally overwhelms me) at least learn about which ingredients are the very worst and try your best to avoid them.

Often, you will find that simply switching from one brand of crackers or juice to another will eliminate some awful stuff! (See a few of our favorite “switches” at the end of this post.)

Maybe giving up your favorite Red Baron Supreme Deep Dish Pizza (Sigh. Lord help me, I could eat it every day and never get tired of it!) is a sad thought.  I understand.  Believe me! I understand.  But if it’s a “sometimes” food, interspersed with a very “clean” diet, toxins aren’t going to build up in your system as much.

Mmmmm…… I can smell them!

McDonald’s french fries are salty, crispy, hot, golden bursts of heaven on your tongue.  But they really shouldn’t be the main “vegetable” in your diet.

As Ralph Nader once said, “If God hadn’t wanted us to eat sugar, He wouldn’t have invented dentists.”  Sugar is like childhood happiness you can eat.  But, again, I don’t think you can count “sugar cane” as a fruit serving.

Coffee may seem like a blessed gift from the gods, coursing through your veins with all the power and energy of a magnificent volcano but it isn’t going to help lengthen your life…. oh wait! I forgot! It will!  I’m going to drink some now.

Ahh.

(Image from fanpop.com)

Thank you, God, for inventing coffee!

But I digress.

Why bother switching brands and reading labels?

The ingredients listed in the Yahoo! article are ALSO used as weed killer, flame retardant and sunscreen.  They are directly linked to: breast tumors, thyroid disease, headaches, dizziness, memory loss, epileptic seizures, lead poisoning, learning disabilities, infertility, cancer, diabetes, kidney disease,  rheumatoid arthritis, intestinal tumors and more.

Many of them have been partially or completely banned in other countries.

Seriously, are you REALLY willing to take that chance with your life?  How about with the lives of your children?

I have never seen evidence linking pesticide-free fresh produce or humanely raised, cage free poultry to wide-spread, horrible, chronic illness.  Yes, you COULD get food poisoning if you don’t wash it or cook it properly…. so wash it and cook it.  Yes, there have been RARE cases when food produced in one person’s yard or farm was contaminated.  There will always be exceptions to every rule.

Now that I got that off my chest (again), I would like to take a moment to highlight my very most favorite part of the article:

Castoreum

WHAT IT IS: Beaver anal gland juice. Really. Beavers combine it with their urine to mark their territory.

FOUND IN: Vanilla or raspberry flavoring in processed foods, labeled only as “natural flavoring.”

WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW:It’s beaver anal gland juice.

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!   As far as I could find, there is NO evidence that Castoreum is especially bad for you.   But, indeed, “it’s beaver anal gland juice.”  This is a good example of the use of the term “natural flavoring.”  Other “natural flavors” include insect exoskeletons, bones and genetically engineered bacteria.  Yum yum yum!

Image from scientopia.org

Take it from this food-loving often gluttonous chubby Hippie Mama!  You can find LOTS of “real” food that is totally delicious and 100% free of things than came from the anuses of rodents.  ew.

I’m a huge cheerleader for Meijer.  I have found a great selection of “real” food there, at very reasonable prices.   Some of the relatively painless switches we’ve made include :

(Please note: Not all of these are totally “natural” but they are better than their more common counterparts.)

We used to eat Nabisco Honey Maid Graham Crackers, which contain, among other things, enriched flour, sugar, partially hydrogenated cottonseed oil, artificial flavors and, possibly, GMO wheat and soy.

Now we eat Meijer Organic Honey Graham Crackers, which have none of those (except organic evaporated cane juice, which is really only marginally “better” than white sugar).

We used to eat Aunt Millie’s Seeded Italian Bread, which contains, among other things, enriched bleached flour (possibly from GMO wheat), sugar, soybean oil (possibly from GMO beans), corn syrup (possibly from GMO corn), corn flour (possibly from GMO corn), azodicarbonamide (a product which must be used with a warning label in Europe), calcium peroxide (fertilizer and bleaching agent. Yum.)

Now we eat Meijer Organic Spelt Bread, which has none of those.

We used to eat Johnsonville Polish Kielbasa which contains salt, corn syrup, dextrose, sodium phosphate (a saline laxative), monosodium glutamate (MSG), sodium erythorbate (fermented corn sugar), and sodium nitrite (a known carnigen).

Now we eat Meijer Naturals Chicken Sausage, which has only chicken, tomatoes, mozzarella cheese, cane juice (hey… nobody’s PERFECT), spices and natural casings.  I have to give special honors to this sausage because it is a new family favorite.  It is AMAZING!!!  It is SO flavorful and easy to prepare! And at only about $3 a package the price is definitely right!

We used to eat Cocoa Puffs, which contain corn (most likely GMO), ”artificial” flavors, and BHT (rocket fuel stabilizer. Seriously.)

Now we eat Cascadian Farms Organic Chocolate O’s, which contain none of those.

As you can see, we aren’t starving or suffering in any way, and these products are very similar in price to what we were buying before.

Go! Shop! Eat! Enjoy! You may find some new products that you like much more than the old. Read labels!!! Don’t sacrifice your health just because you’re “used to” a certain brand of food or beverage!

Now I’ve officially made myself hungry so I’m off to find something delicious.  I’ll meet you back here soon!

Sweet Hippie Daughter on Christmas morning. Proof that we have not yet gone over 100% to the “real food” side of the aisle!

I’ve been eating it my whole life and I’m OK!

Over the past few months I have written a few posts (like this one) in which I discuss the importance of eating real food.

These posts have each been met by one or more people saying, “I’ve been eating this way my whole life and I’m OK.  I think you are making too big of a deal about it.”

Let me begin by saying, I understand where you are coming from!  I have only given “real” food any serious thought at all in the past year or so and, even with strong feelings about it, I often cave in to things like frozen pizza, fast food and lunch meat because they are cheap and easy and… let’s face it… awesomely delicious.

Go ahead, real foodies.  Tell me your cauliflower patty is JUST as tasty as a Big Mac.  I don’t believe you.

Anyway… I digress…

The point is, I understand.

Further, I would like to say that if you were raised on a steady diet of Poptarts and Bar S hotdogs (you know who you are) and you now make an earnest effort to add some canned peas to your pasta I applaud you!  All progress is good progress!

And I recognize that it is virtually impossible to live in our modern society without ingesting SOMETHING that SOMEONE says is “toxic.”  For example, I switched from a popular brand of canned beans to Meijer brand organic canned beans and was feeling pretty proud of myself until someone pointed out that canned goods almost universally contain BPA. Well… again, all progress is good progress. I can only do so much.

So, now that I’ve said all that, please allow me to say this:

Unless you are under the age of 20, you have NOT been “eating this way your whole life.”

American food has changed DRASTICALLY in the past generation!

In the past 50 years, the nutrient and mineral content in our food has decreased drastically.  Selective breeding, genetic modification and poor treatment of the soil itself means that we have larger food, that is more carbohydrate-intense but lacking in protein, amino acids and as many as 6 key nutrients.  (Click here for more)

In the past 2 generations, mercury levels in seafood have doubled.  (Click here for more)

The first GMO (genetically modified organism) food (a tomato) was marketed to the public in 1994 – a mere 18 years ago.  They were touted as the perfect solution… plants would yield a higher production, bigger fruit, and be more resistant to drought and disease.  The problem is that some research shows that the human body does not recognize these new creations as food.  The result is damage to the kidneys and liver and digestive tract, poor metabolism of the nutrients, and more.  Worse, some studies show that the effects of GMOs are cumulative through generations (see picture, below).  If that is the case, we don’t know what it is doing to our children and their children because the first generation of people who have eaten GM foods their whole lives are only just beginning to have children of their own.   None of this even touches on what happens when the animals we eat are fed GMOs.  If they are affected on a very basic, cellular level, and then we eat that “tainted” meat (eggs, milk, etc), how does it affect us?  (Click here for more)  The fact is that there simply has not been enough research done on GMO foods to know if they are safe.  Maybe they are fine.  But there is a good chance that they are not.  For that reason dozens of countries have partial or total bans on the use of GMOs or they require companies to label their products if they have been modified.  The US has no such restrictions or requirements because it would be too expensive for the food manufacturers.  Don’t even get me started on the politics of THAT!   Currently, up to 85 percent of U.S. corn is genetically engineered as are 91 percent of soybeans and 88 percent of cotton (cottonseed oil is often used in food products). It has been estimated that upwards of 70 percent of processed foods on supermarket shelves–from soda to soup, crackers to condiments–contain genetically engineered ingredients.

Since the 1950s the use of antibiotics in farm animals has skyrocketed.  The result?  We now have “super bacteria” that are resistant to antibiotic treatment.  This means that now, when we get sick, it is MUCH harder to treat than it was 50 years ago because the drugs we have are no longer effective.  (click here for more)

In 1993 rGBH was introduced to milk-producing cows in order to produce more milk from each animal.  This hormone has been linked directly to an increased risk for breast, prostate and other cancers in humans.  Again, the children who were raised drinking this milk are only beginning to reach adulthood.  The effects of this drug on the animals that provided their food will only begin to show up in the next 10-20 years.  By then, a whole new generation will have been affected.  (click here fore more)

A cow, treated with rGBH, now infected with mastitis.

I could go on and on telling about new additives, drugs, science, etc that have been introduced in relatively recent times.

There is another side of all this, as well.

What do all of these “advanced” farming practices do to our planet?

They result in massive soil erosion  the pollution of ground water, the disruption of local ecosystems and more.  In turn, that results in the need for MORE chemicals, genetic modification, etc which results in more problems, and so on.  (click here for more)

And where are we, as a society,  in terms of health?

Life expectancy in Americans is actually decreasing. Children born now can expect to die at a younger age than their parents and grandparents.  (more)

In 1958 1.5 million people were diagnosed with diabetes.  In 2010  there were nearly 19 million people being treated for the disease. (more)

In 1962 about 13% of the population was considered obese.  Today those numbers are fast approaching the 50% mark. (more)

Liver, thyroid, breast, testicle  cancers (all mentioned above as being connected to pesticides and GMOs) and more have increased steadily since 1992. (more)

Rates of autism have increased by an astonishing 78% in the past 10 years. (more)

Mental disorders are on the rise among young people. (more)

The number of women struggling to get pregnant and maintain their pregnancies rose  40% between 1982 and 2002. (more)

Is it coincidence that, in the same time period that we have altered our food in nearly every conceivable way we have watched our population’s incidence of health issues rise exponentially?

The solution (or at least progress toward the solution) lies in organics.

Organic food, by legal definition can not contain any GMOs, artificial chemicals or preservatives, hormones or antibiotics.  Organic food goes through minimal processing.  (There are exceptions, but the rules generally follow those guidelines.)  And if a farmer wants to label his food “organic” he must farm in a way that gives back to the earth as much as he takes out.

Some researchers have tried to say that organic food is no more nutritious than “conventional” food but this article from US News explains very clearly the fallacy of the famous study in question.

When all is said and done, I again have to say that any nutritious food (fruits, veggies, lean meats, eggs, milk, etc) is better than none.  I know that, for some people, the luxury of spending even a few extra dollars each month is just not possible.  I get that.

But for many, we are making a conscious choice to save money on food so that we can spend it on the latest technology or the nicest name brand clothes or…. so so many other things.

If there is even a CHANCE that all of those health concerns can be minimized for your family by simply purchasing one brand of apples instead of another, isn’t it worth a little sacrifice?

It is time for all of us to open our eyes and be aware of what the food industry is pushing on us because, if you are an adult, the fact of the matter is you have NOT been eating like this your whole life and, chances are you are NOT OK.  Chances are you are suffering from cancer or diabetes or digestive issues or attention problems or arthritis or migraine headaches or sleep disorders or fibromyalgia or some combination of the dozens of diseases linked to “frankenfoods.”

One last thing:  one person said that they had no issue with the pesticide and GMO companies because they provide jobs and contribute to the economy.  In response, I have to ask, how much has the exponential increase in sickness cost our nation?  Where will our economy be when the resources of our land have been plundered to the point that the very ground under our feet becomes toxic?  What job is worth stealing years of healthy living from the current generation of young people?

I’ll climb off my soapbox now.  Thanks for reading today’s hippie rant.  Here’s to a tomorrow full of healthy nutritious food!

Are you, too, seeking to save the earth, promote world peace and raise productive citizens without expending too much effort? 

Why not follow LazyHippieMama on WordPress, by email or Facebook to get all the updates. 

If we work on our goals together, they may be a little easier to achieve!

Baking Cookies, Stealing Ideas, Awards and Thankfulness

hahahaha! It’s a Hippie Turkey from Zazzle.com!

I’m not really a very creative or crafty person.

There are a few reasons for this.

#1 – LAZY hippie mama.  Why spend a whole bunch of time hand-crocheting a blanket when I can, for about the same amount of money (have you priced good yarn lately?!) buy one at a craft show or local shop?  Maybe when I don’t have kids in the house and am not working and so forth I’ll feel more inspired to direct some energies toward being a producer and not just a consumer.  Time will tell.

#2 – I totally lack artistic talent of any kind.  I distinctly remember a sixth grade art project in which we were to draw our “dream room” in perspective using a pencil to draw as well as to shade.  I seriously labored over that project for weeks.  I thought of every little detail and studied pictures to notice how things appeared bigger or smaller as you looked at them from different angles.  I don’t think there were many school projects I ever threw myself into with such passion.  As I turned it in I was practically bursting with pride.  I had finally created a real work of art… not just one of those childish elementary school construction paper projects.  A few days later I got it back with a C- grade.  My dreams were crushed.  I gave up all hope of ever succeeding as an artist.  When, years later, I saw “A Christmas Story” I totally empathized with poor Ralphie who’s Wicked Witch of the West teacher just didn’t understand his efforts.

#3 – The Destructor.  If you don’t know about my Little Hippie Baby you can get some idea of what he’s like by reading this or this or this.  Perhaps when he reaches that special age where he knows not to drink the glue or try to cut the dog’s tail off with the scissors we can have some crafty supplies about the house.

So, knowing that, you will understand my bafflement when people say, “You should ask Hippie Mama to design the ultra-cool Christmas play sets.  She’s SO CREATIVE!”

I’m really not.

But I am pretty good at copying other people’s clever ideas… you know… when I feel ambitious.  A few times a year.

Last week, for instance.

Sweet Hippie Daughter has been struggling to master the skill of multiplying by 4, but she’s worked hard and I think she’s starting to get it.  (Please note that she has no trouble with 2s, 3s, or 5s.  I don’t get it either.)  I had the idea that she could bake cookies (she LOVES to cook) and quadruple the recipe.  Well… I didn’t have the idea.  I stole it from WeirdUnsocializedHomeschoolers.  They blogged about the benefits of setting your kids free (safely) in the kitchen a while back.

She did great!  She even multiplied the fractions (once I explained how that works)!  I was very proud of her.

Of course, this assignment had the pleasant side-effect of filling our kitchen with cookies.

Score!

It seemed only appropriate that we share the yummy abundance, so we made little Thanksgiving packages for all of our neighbors.  They really are great neighbors.  They are friendly and generally not too nosy and they don’t get mad at us when we are the last ones on the block to rake our leaves…. or at least, if they are mad they keep it to themselves.

We topped our cookies with a little homemade turkey note.

A few years ago I was at the library and they had a super cute turkey on the bulletin board made out of circles and triangles.  I can TOTALLY make circles and triangles!  So, now, that’s my go-to turkey design.

See what I mean about stealing other people’s ideas?

So, since this was such a rare and lovely day of creative expression and giving, I thought I would document it with pictures.

Cute, right?   Don’t you wish you were my neighbor?

In other news, Coffee Powered Mom gave me a great honor last week!  She awarded me the “Coffee Powered Writer Award” for my post “Is Home birth a Scary Option?”

This especially meant a lot to me because that post, in particular, is very close to my heart.  It was not a blast to the good doctors and nurses who have dedicated their lives to bringing babies safely into the world.  Rather, it was a plea to the American Medical System to empower women to make the choices that are best for them and their babies, without interference from the big businesses of pharmaceuticals and insurance.  I was trying to point out that we’ve gone so far from nature that natural now seems weird and unsafe to us.

Thank you CPM!  I love your blog, too!

If you, like me, enjoy stealing other people’s awesome ideas, CPM is a great resource!  This is one I’ve got great plans for.

Finally, it wouldn’t be thanksgiving week without making a thankful list!

Few things in the world make me happier than counting my blessings.  It can pull me out of a funk every time.  So here is a list of eight things I’m feeling especially thankful for today, in no particular order.

Why eight?

Because I told SHD to choose a number and that’s what she chose.

#1 I am thankful for my Handsome Hippy Hubby.  He really is the kindest, gentlest, most patient husband in the whole world.  He puts up with so much from me and gives so much of himself and, after all these years, he still kisses me and tells me he loves me every day.  I really love that guy!

#2 I am thankful for comfy shoes.

#3 I am thankful for baby wipes.  Seriously, I don’t know how a mommy could survive without them.

#4 I am thankful for my awesome office chair.  It’s just the right amount of tippy and swively so that I can be restless and productive at the same time.

#5 I am thankful for supportive undergarments.  Some things in life need to be firmly harnessed.  I have a feeling that this will only become more true as time goes on.

#6 I am thankful for my Kindle Fire.  It’s such a handy little tool!

#7 I am thankful for my BFF.  She’s always been there for me and she makes me laugh and she gave my Little Hippie Baby a very sweet little friend to have as his own BFF.

Little Hippie Baby and M. Love those boys!

#8 I’m thankful for people who respond to my blog posts by “liking” them or “commenting (even when they disagree)” or following me on Facebook.  All those little orange notification stars are like happy little surprises that come to me all day long and tell me, “Even though you can’t draw a picture in perspective and you are too lazy to knit your own socks, I think your writing is, at least occasionally, worth reading.”  They just make me feel good.

Happy Monday, dear readers!  It’s Thanksgiving week!  There is no better way to get your Hippie on than to give thanks.  Have fun with all that Thankfulness and I’ll see you back here in a day or two.

Breaking the Food Code

What the heck is in our food?!

When I started this blog, all about being a hippie mama, I felt like I was the most “crunchy” of all my friends.  I breastfed my babies and wore them in slings and had recently started cloth diapering.

Little did I know the real world of true hippie-dom that I had yet to explore!

Doing a little research on a topic like, “making safe detergent for your cloth diapers,” led me to learn about parabens in personal products.

This happened to me every single time I wrote a new post.

I tell you… learn too much and you’ll begin to shudder with the fear that the big mean goblin made of pink slime  and genetically engineered produce will jump out from behind the chemical-laden stacks of toilet paper in your local superstore and eat you for dinner!

I’m learning to process the information without totally losing my sanity, but it has affected my life more than I ever thought it would.

More than in any other area of life, my food choices have been affected.

I admit it… I still eat Red Baron pizzas and Eggos.

They’re just so EASY.

That said, I’ve become a compulsive label reader.  I even read labels on items I have no intention of ever buying, just out of morbid curiosity.

You would think that this would be a simple process.  Sugar is sugar, flour is flour, right?

Ha!

So NOT the case!

I don’t know how it is for those of you in other countries (though I’m curious, so feel free to share!), but here in the good ol’ USA there are more than FIFTY names for “sugar” on a food label.  Corn Syrup, Maltodextrin, Barly Malt, Evaporated Cane Juice, Fructose, Glucose, Dextrin…..  sugar.

Wheat, Bulgar, Couscous, Semolina, Modified Food Starch… flour.

And did you know that approximately 25% of the items sold in your local super-mart contain some form of corn?  I’m not saying 25% of the food.  Corn is in everything.

Soy… same thing.

And food companies are tricky!  They know that you don’t want to give your kid a cup of sugar for breakfast… but “vitamin fortified cereal with whole wheat and Maltodextrin,” well…  Vitamins are good, right?  And whole wheat is great nutrition! And since no one knows what maltodextrin is we will just assume that it must be safe if the FDA approved it.

Hmmm…

As it turns out, maltodextrin is sugar.  ”Made with whole wheat” could mean that they used 400 pounds of bleached flour and 1 cup of whole wheat.  I’m not saying that is what all companies do, but you can bet that some do just that.

And then there is the “other” stuff.  You know… the fine print at the bottom of the ingredients list.

For example;  the “propellant” in Pam Cooking Spray?  Propane.

Red dye?  Squished bugs.

The shellac that you use to shine your wood is also on jelly beans.  It is also made from bugs.  In this case, not their carcasses, but their excretions.  Yum.

“Natural Flavors.”  This can be ANYTHING not man made.  Anything.

Propylene glycol (also labeled as E1520) is antifreeze.  Yes.  Antifreeze.  Like you put in your car.

I could go on and on.  It’s frightening.  Some people really would just rather not know.  Ignorance is bliss and all that.

Some people know and simply don’t care.  ”I’ve been eating it this long and I don’t have cancer so it must be OK.”

Even if you do want to know, it’s virtually impossible to keep up.

I’ve gotten some great tips from the good folks at 100 Days of Real Food.

1) Most real food doesn’t need more than 5 ingredients.

Think about it.

What goes in bread?  Flour, eggs, yeast, baking soda….  so why does store-bought bread have 42 ingredients listed?

What goes in alfredo sauce?  Cream, cheese, butter…  so why does canned alfredo have a label-full of words no one can pronounce?

There are exceptions.  But, in general, food doesn’t need more than 5 ingredients.

2) If there are ingredients listed that no reasonable person has in their home kitchen, you shouldn’t eat it.  Maybe you don’t cook with saffron or curry or popcorn shoots, but those are items you can buy most anywhere and lots of people have them in their cabinets.

Do you have Butylated Hydroxytoluene on your spice shelf?   Me either.  (But it’s in Quaker Oatmeal Squares.  And jet fuel.)

The long and short of it is this:  Real food doesn’t require a material data sheet.  If you are looking to break the food code, simply choose foods made with foods you know.

My philosophy?  If you are eating a cookie made with REAL eggs and wheat and oatmeal and butter and fruit then you don’t even have to feel guilty about the calories because it’s just so darn full of nutrients!

I don’t really know if that’s true, but it makes me happy.

 

 

Raw Milk 411

When I was growing up… not THAT long ago….  we had raw milk delivered to our house from a nearby farm.  The cattle on the farm lived in a huge pasture.  They ate grass.  They were healthy.  Subsequently, we never got sick from drinking their milk.  Not ever.  Not even when we were little babies.

If someone had gotten sick from the milk, it would have been a very simple matter to trace it back to the exact herd, and maybe even the specific cow, that was giving “bad” milk.

Meanwhile, in many urban areas, cattle were kept in horrible, dirty, stinking feedlots.  They were fed inferior food, and therefore needed artificial supplementation that could come from anything from corn to alcohol by-products.  These cattle were often sick because of their horrible diets and unsanitary living conditions.  They needed to be given massive, routine doses of antibiotics just to survive.  To increase profits, the cows were also given hormones to promote their growth and the amount of milk given.

The milk from these cows was riddled with bacteria.

Whoa. Big surprise.

So, in order to keep people from becoming ill from this inferior milk, the companies marketing it pasteurized it – killing the bad bacteria, as well as much of the good vitamins and nutrients.  Then it was “fortified” by adding artificial versions of the good stuff back in. Keep in mind that many of the antibiotics and hormones are not removed by this process.  Further, the milk is “homogenized.”  This changes the chemical bonds of the milk so that the cream doesn’t separate.

By any reasonable person’s definition this processed stuff is not as nutritious as the raw milk that comes from healthy cows raised in a proper, humane fashion.

However, the FDA, in their infinite wisdom (sarcasm intended,) made a huge, overarching statement to protect us all from the badly mass-produced milk.  They didn’t make it illegal to treat cows in a horrible fashion, allowing them to live in filthy diseased conditions…. no… that would have hurt big dairy producer’s profits.  Instead, they made it near impossible (in some states, illegal) to buy raw milk from any farmer, ever.

So now we live in a country where it’s legal to buy cigarettes at any corner store.  We have artificial ingredients, containing known carcinogens in God-knows how much of our food.  School kids are given “pasteurized processed American cheese food” (that’s honestly what it’s called, right on the package) instead of cheddar or mozzarella.

But we can’t drink raw milk.

Because that might make us sick.

“That makes perfect sense,” said no one, ever.

Actually, statistically, you have a significantly greater chance of contracting food poisoning from grocery store produce than you do from a healthy, grass-fed cow’s raw milk.

Exactly what are the benefits of drinking raw milk?

Well… aside from the fact that you will NOT be consuming drugs and hormones that actually alter your body…

Raw milk has been known to HELP CURE food allergies.  Many people who can’t tolerate processed milk thrive on the real stuff.

Kids that grow up exclusively on raw milk have stronger, straighter, healthier teeth as well as jaw bones that accommodate all of their teeth, eliminating the need to have wisdom teeth pulled. (Ever wonder why God gave you more teeth than room for them?  He didn’t.)

Children who drink raw milk have fewer ear infections, fewer asthma attacks, fewer colds, and generally stronger immune systems.

People who drink raw milk have lower chance of osteoporosis, and Alzheimer’s disease.

Read all about these benefits and more here or here or here.

Don’t you want to rush out and buy some?

Well… expect to jump through some hoops.  Use a code name to make the contact.  Meet a farmer in a back alley…

Not really, but sort of.

Here is a great listing, by state, of dairies selling unpasteurized dairy products.  Note the lengthy warning to farmers at the top of the page.  Sheesh.

But if you REALLY want to  make a difference, go here, find out who your elected officials on all levels are, and contact them, asking them to allow us to buy real, whole, local foods at our own discretion instead of that of the federal government.

Fast Friday – There is Such a Thing as “Too Natural”

I am very much in favor of eating a diet full of natural foods.  I say, get rid of pesiticides, genetically modified food, hormone injected meats and so forth.

Eat the Earth, I say!

Here is a picture of my Little Hippie Baby, earlier this week, doing just exactly that. 

I didn’t mean for him to take me quite so literally. 

A day or two later I washed a load of cloth diapers.  When it was done, I found this in the bottom of my washer.

image from cmgc.co.nz

Well… ok.  Not literally.  I didn’t think to take a picture of what I found.  It was actually just one rock, about the size and shape of those pictured.

But still…

Ew.

So, apparently, you CAN actually eat the Earth.  But you shouldn’t, because it’s hard to digest.

Have a great weekend, dear readers.  Get your hippie on!  God willing, I’ll meet you back here next week.

image from jokearoo.com

Clarification, Encouragement, Recipes, Folk-Medicine and Lusty Bible Verses

I have a few random notes to share with you today.  They are little things that have been on my mind or that have caught my eye and I thought you might enjoy them.

First, I would like to announce that I am not SPAM!

Apparently, there has been some confusion, somewhere along the line, and WordPress is shipping my comments off to the SPAM can.

In order to clear up any confusion, Spam is “Spiced Ham” made by Hormel corporation.  It is a canned, sort-of  vaguely pork-based product with a bizarre level of saltiness that makes it freakishly addictive even though you know it is horribly bad for you.

This is SPAM.
(image from http://www.ashrinkslife.com)

I am not SPAM.  I promise!  I am a Lazy Hippie Mama from Michigan.  I was made by John and Violet and I am a fresh, sort-of vaguely granola hippie who hopes to have enough wit and wisdom to be a tad addictive AND good for you.

This is me (and my Handsome Hippie Hubby).

If I used to read and comment on your blog often (and I try very hard to visit everyone who visits me) and I suddenly disappeared, you may want to check your SPAM folder and “Un-spam” me.  I didn’t abandon you!

Frankly, I’m not technologically clever enough to figure out how to do much more with my computer than type and hit “send/publish/save/print/etc.”  Only because WordPress is very user-friendly am I able to blog at all!

Moving on….

A friend posted this on Facebook and I absolutely loved it.  I thought I would share:

Also, I came across “100 days of real food” and LOVE the site!  It’s real and simple and well written.  You should go check it out!

Along the same lines, I thought I’d share my family’s new favorite dinner.  We found the recipe in a Rachel Ray magazine about a month ago and it’s fast and fresh and healthy (which you can’t really always say of Ms. Ray’s recipes) and the whole family absolutely loves it!

Click the picture for all the details!

We use all-natural mayo with olive oil, substitute left-over or other grilled chicken for rotisserie, and serve it over romaine since none of us are big watercress fans.  It’s the time of year when we can buy fresh tomatoes and corn from the farmer down the road which makes it 1000 times more wonderfully flavorful (and cheap).  Even the 7-year-old will take “seconds” of this giant bowl of salad.  Yummy!

Next, I hear many of my friends and neighbors are feeling “under the weather.”  Boo for late-summer sniffles and sore throats!  My grandma had a tried and true recipe:

A hot mug of tea (as steaming/boiling hot as you can possibly stand to drink without injury)

with: one shot of whiskey

a tablespoon or honey

a generous wallop of fresh lemon juice.

Drink it up and then bury yourself under the blankets and sweat like a dog all night long.

You’ll feel better by morning!  (Usually).

For added Hippie Health, you can choke down a spoonful of fresh garlic (not powdered or pilled or processed… it’s gotta be the stinky stuff) before, and gnaw on some fresh ginger too.

There actually is some science (not just folklore) to all this.  Tea, honey, lemon, garlic and ginger all have lots of wonderful “anti” properties (antibiotic, antiviral, antiinflamatory (sp?), etc).  Alcohol will knock you out so you can rest, which is what the body needs when it is fighting infection.  Covering up + the heat of the tea will raise your core temperature a degree or two which can help kill germs (yes, fever CAN be a good thing).

Try hard to avoid Tylenol or Motrin (or their generic equivalent) and, especially, over-the-counter cold medicine.

I get it.  Sometimes you’ve got to do what you’ve got to do to get through the day.  I’ve got all those things in my medicine cabinet too.  But if you can get through without it (or, at least, with a minimum amount), there are some pretty conclusive studies that any of those types of drugs can actually suppress your body’s ability to heal itself and make you feel bad for a longer period of time in the end.

Finally, I’ll leave you with this Bible passage I read today.

Some of you may think that the Bible is boring and hard to understand.  And some parts of it are. But today I read Ezekiel 23.  This particular chapter is about 2 sisters who became prostitutes and, the Bible tells us, really enjoyed their work very much. They were very good at what they did and became rather famous throughout the entire Middle East, though they, apparently, had no fondness for Babylonians.  The Bible doesn’t tell us why.

One sister, in particular, recalled her days in Egypt and the Bible tells us this about her:

…she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

-Ezekiel 23:20

Oh-kay then.

*ahem*

Well.

I once took a class on Biblical exegesis but I’m pretty sure that verse needs no further interpretation.

See?  The Bible is NOT always boring.  You just never know what you’re going to get when you sit down to read in the morning.

Oiy.

I gotta go.

Enjoy your day, dear readers.  I’ll meet you back here soon.  :)